I have been feeling oddly joyful and at peace since yesterday.
I also slept so well yesterday, it feels like it has been ages since I slept as good as yesterday.
I am liking this.
This peace.
This calming joy.
Feels so blissful.
Thank you all!
Life lessons and Ego
This week had extremes on both good and bad. While I am very blessed and thankful for the good, the life lesson learnt from the bad is
- I am not as good/intelligent/wise/kind as I think I am. Introspect, meditate and relentlessly identify everytime I am acting out of ego and not out of genuinity/love and constantly keep nipping ego over and over again.
The second life lesson is very close to Rachel McAdams vow in the movie “The vow”. “To speak when words are needed and to share silence when they’re not”
- When you recognise someone else is acting out of ego. It doesn’t matter if that someone is someone you love and respect or not (actually easier if it is a stranger), just remain silent. No point pointing it out since the quality of ego itself screams “I am”. If they are unbearably egoistic then of course walk way but for majority of mankind just letting them live out their moments of ego is best for everyone involved.
At this point in time I do not know how to help someone else come out of their ego. However, in my own life Bhairavi Upasana and meditation helps
Entitlement
When you talk about it, of course its your ego, and any ego is leads to downfall..
“Everything is in God’s hands, and you are His tool to be used by Him as He pleases. Try to grasp the significance of ‘all is His’, and you will immediately feel free from all burdens. What will be the result of your surrender to Him? None will seem alien, all will be your very own, your Self.”
-Sri Anandamayi Ma
I have lost many people/things/status etc… in all aspects of life due to entitlemen big and small. It is quiet a shame because this has been the case for many years. Good news is, at least now I see it clearly.
I owe never to assume that I am better than someone else.
Failures from past: Despite Navanee being the CTO, having worked at Zoho, Freshwork etc… thought I was better because of my interest in astro physics at the time, not paying enough attention at Shoonya because I have read it all, judging people because of the “language” they code in when I myself hate it when other developers judge me for my editor, assuming “DevOps” are not as intelligent as developers because they don’t “code” and judging all DevOps as stupids until the time when ironically I myself ended up in DevOps, thinking my entire org runs on 4 API and to top it all…. the relationship disastersa are too embarassing to even admit it but I will. Topping the list was falling in love with emotionally unavailable men (who I think never even considered me as friends in the first place) and deluding myself into believing that at some magical moment they will love me too because I am an entitled prick who thought the world revolved around her whim and fancies. Thank God those got no where and died before beginning.
Ooo the main one is, I actually think I can write better than Gaiman. And I have never return a book so far, not sold a penny while he is a global icon. If you have read this blog I grant you permission to smack me in the head next time you see me. I deserve that, for all this delusion, ego/entitlement that I have been acting. I guess it ain’t going away sooner, character changes happen over a course of time. So yeah, your smack would be appreciated
Good news is, at least now I see it clearly. My sense of entitlement ruining my life since 1994
I will spend the rest of my life living conciously and surrendering to universe.🙇♀️
13 reasons why
- because you would rather take train even if it is long and uncomfortable than a flight since you care about carbon footprint
- because you dont ask questions
- because you are patient
- because you are somewhat funny
- because you are the only adult that i know who is down for disneyland
- because you are smart and hard working
- because if you make that big of a deal about little things like food waste, I imagine how sincere you would be about the big things in life
- of course, because you are sincere
- because maybe we can be ourselves and yet be liked by one another?
- because you argue about the silliest things and I find it funny
- because i like you
- because you like me too?
- because for the love of god, for once in our lives maybe we got it right
Of Ram and GanGA
Recently with the inaguration of Ram Mandir round the corner there is one fascinating story that came up. Apparently there is a sect of people who are descendants of the Indians who fought against the Mugal invasion that led to the demolition of Ram temple. They were so heart broken that they could not save the Ram temple, they took a vow never to wear turban (wearing turban is a symbol of prestidge to them). They were so ashamed of themselves and felt so sad that they could save the temple. Appaerntly the descendants of those Indians till this day do not wear turban. (Well of course a wide sect of people stopped wearing Turban for fashion but there also exists descendants of this group of people).
Imagine many hundred years ago a heart wrecking thing happens in your family and it is so heart wrecking for you that you pass it on and let it remain in your generation’s heart to restore the place of worship.
I started writing a review of the book Ganga and this story about the turban popped up in my head.The reason why I am bringin this up in the book review of Ganga is that, just like that many thousand years ago when for some reason the earth had gone dry. A king vowed to pray and bring rain/glacier to melt down to earth. He failed and his son failed, his grandson failed and his great grandson succeeded in bringing Ganga to earth.
If you are sceptical about prayers bringing river, consider it that for 4-5 generations they dug canals or routes for the river to flow.
At any rate what matters is the persistence and discipline that has transcended generations to come. WOW! and here we are in the age of technology where we just with one notification sound we loose focus and get distracted.
Let us remember the history of the ancestors, raise our focus and live our lives to the fullest.
Mansfield Park – Awesomely Austen
Oh! boy. Jane Austen ❤
The level of maturity Fanny has as a 18 yr old, I am just getting there as a 29/30yr old.
The amount of strength that Fanny had at 18, I am not sure I still have such strength.
This is the least fanciful of Austen books that I have ever read. In real world, I dont think Fanny would have ended up with Edmund. Given the emotional pressure from literally everyone in her family and friends, it would be very realistic if Fanny had just married Henry. Thankfully her strength, patience and understanding was rewarded, she ended up with the man she loves.
I really doubt 18yr olds have maturity like that. Which is also why I found it hard to read “Aristotle and Dante – part 2”. But Kevin my dear friend told me that he himself and some of his close friends were indeed mature beyond their age even as teenagers. No wonder Kevin is one of the kindest people that I know. Perhaps there are teens who are as understanding even at such young age.
Both in novels and in real lives, people with such big hearts seem to have a blessed life.
More inspiration to be strong and have a big heart. Also, more inspiration to pick up “Aristotle and Dante – part 2” again. Just because it seems unrealistic to me doesnt mean it is unrealistic. It just means that there are people who are better than I am. But hey! I am just a late bloomer 🙂
Hymn for the weekend
Before we go our merry ways of weekend, let us take a moment to pause and send love to the ongoing war in various parts of the world like Israel and Ukraine.
Just like how you deserve to live a life in good health, they deserve it too.
As much as you, they deserve to live their life at ease.
They also deserve a joyful life.
So, together let’s send love ❤️
May we live our lives with ease.
May we be happy.
May we be healthy.
May we be kind.
May we love and be loved.
Capitalism, love, betrayal & revival
Recently got conned by someone I had know for more than 25 years. No major loss, betrayal on some level that made my prespective on the world slightly negative. Here’s a post fixing that.
Having worked in IT, here is my simplistic understanding of the business world. The ultra supremely rich people pool their money and call themselves “Venture capitalist”. They then invest their money in ideas/people that they think would become profitable. Because they are ultra rich, they invest in many companies. Even if one among the 100 companies that they win become profitable and eventually gets public offering they will become even richer.
Taking this principle into the world of love. Should a loving and kind person stop being kind just because one of their loved one exploited their love or betrayed them? No. The more abundant the love in you, the more okay you are to the risk and the actuality of betrayal. Just like the ultra rich, they know that 99% of the investment is not going to yield profit, yet they invest because they know all that it takes is for one company to become profitable.
Similarly, let us take the learnings of betrayal and become more wise. That doesn’t mean we become grumpy and cynical. Let us always continue to love and be loved because nothing in the world comes close to love.
அன்பே சிவம்!
Rome – Horrible History – Book review
Terry Deary does his magic again. yet another engaging book on history.
I find the love triangle of Julius Caesar, Marc Anthony and Cleo Patra fascinating to read every time I bump into it. The power, the glamour, the intellect, the courage, the pain, the betrayal… ufff the story takes us to a whirlwind of emotions. Many thousand years later, the emotions still remain, played by different people over and over again. How fascinating and wonderful is mankind? We have progressed a lot both in terms of emotion and technology. We deal with things much better.
Horrible History is definitely a recommended read for anyone. It is interesting, it is fun.
Would be amazing if any Asian or Indian wrote an equivalent of Horrible History series for Indian history.
Many popular Western and American series are often Indianised. Like Humans of Bombay sprang from Humans of NewYork. Following the success of New Yorker’s beautiful series “Modern Love” sprang a “Modern Love” series for every state in India. Given all that, come on India, do me a “Horrible History” with an Indian twist.
Hymn for the weekend 💚
It is easy to love and be loved. Especially to love someone who is in a tough spot because then there is all the more reason to love. But then why should we express and be loving only when the goings get tough when love is easy. I wish I knew this sooner. Be loving for no reason, because love is light. To love and be loved feels so much lighter that why would we be anything otherwise?
In the lines of love, came across this quote that transformed a rocky dynamic into a loving one in my life:
“It is not a lack of love, but a lack of friendship that makes unhappy marriages.”
- Friedrich Nietzsche
It seems so trivial, but when I read the quote it felt so transformational, the failed marriages around me made sense. They never stopped loving each other. It really is easy to love. Especially if you are not a teen, been reading books on kindness, love etc.. even more easy to love. I mean, it is easy otherwise too. But for sustenance and continuity, especially when hurt in the name of love when in any relationship to another, to heal and grow together needs respect and friendship.
May we be happy
May we be healthy
May we live life with ease
May we love and be loved
A drop 